Back to the simple. With the holidays over, the sparkle set aside and the baking resting peacefully on my rear, Winter sets in.
I remember when I was a kid, that countdown for the holidays.....
we could still have a Christmas tree in school then. We could sing Away in a Manger, we knew Good King Wenceslas, we even exchanged gifts by drawing names in our classroom.
Santa came every year to the VA Center and we all got a bag of nuts with an orange and an apple, and we were thrilled to get it.
Families gathered and meals were shared, distant relatives stopped in for a visit, it seemed to last such a long time. It was a Christmas Season, with New Years nestled in, everything seemed to stop and say....celebrate! Get together. Rest.
I wondered, what is it that makes it seem so different now.
so fast
gone in an instant
Is it just that I am older? That my kids have grown? Did I loose the anticipation?
The joy of Christ's birth is to be celebrated daily, not just in a day....I know this. Yet, I long for that feeling of being a child enveloped in the holiday magic. What is different?
Do I perhaps glamorize a by gone day?
A day with down town shopping, rather than malls, small local shops with bells that rang when you entered. Displays in the window about Christmas, not merchandise and sales, stomping the snow off your winter boots and shaking the winter chill before setting out from the five and dime to the local hardware store.
Was it knowing you had to get everything for dinner before the grocery store closed because you sure couldn't get it Christmas Eve.
Perhaps living in a place where so few relatives are, I miss aunts and uncles, cousins and grandparents gathering to the smell of bacon while the rustling of wrapping paper tries to drown out conversation.
Did I forget to slow down?
Did I focus on wrong things?
Am I just expecting too much?
It is not the let down of holiday blues, not even the dread of cold, gray winter days ahead, or even as much the willingness to be caught up in commercialism that wears on me so. It is the seeming loss of a simpler time.
Things just moved slower, more deliberate, thought out or with purpose if you will.
My grandmother may have said..."what?" Maybe it was all fast for her too.
Yet I can't seem to shake the thought that we all move too fast now.
We have so much to do and seem to accomplish so little.
My grandmother worked harder than anyone I knew, generations of past did. It isn't to say people don't work hard today, they do.
I just wonder why we fill so much of our time here, on the computer, looking at things that soothe us, inform us, waste our time even.
Why we fill every day of the calendar with something to do as if life itself had nothing to offer of it's own.
I am the worst waster of time, and I hate that.
Maybe that is why the season of Christmas passed so quickly. Did I forget to hold on to all it had to offer by filling it with things I had to do?
How does life get simple?
Go ahead and laugh here.....what a concept. Life is never simple, but how is it more peaceful, more satisfying? How do I find the magic again?
I could RESOLVE something new. I know- another New Years resolution to be but broken.
Funny how that goes, always something to better ourselves, the world around us, our time, diet and money.
All broken
tossed aside
forgotten
when life sets in.
I could resolve to rest. Not physically.
I could resolve to rest. Not emotionally.
I resolve to rest....spiritually.
To be still and know that God is God. That all things are in his hands and that he offers more than I could ever plan for my day.
You see, I forget that in life, crazy life that moves so very fast, my only rest and peace is in God. Did I know that as a child? Not really.
But as a child life happened around me and I experienced it. I was caught up in what the day had to offer not in what I had planned for the day.
Now as an adult I can rest in what God has planned for my day, I can chose to be caught up in seeing his glory in all things.
Even in slow, silent things.
Even in things I would not wish for.
I can be caught up in the majesty over the magic.
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